10 ways to manage anger

10 ways to manage anger, a reaction to unfulfilled wishes and undesirable consequences, is a constructive, natural, and healthy emotion when properly expressed.

During anger, as with all other emotions, some changes occur in the body. Our heart rate and blood pressure rise, our breathing becomes more frequent. Most importantly, during intense anger, healthy thinking and communication skills weaken, which can make the person feel helpless. Situations that cause anger are usually various disruptions in life, traffic, work stress, financial difficulties, losses, dissatisfaction with oneself, inability to express oneself, intense anxieties or health problems. Communication becomes unhealthy when you cannot convey yourself correctly to the person in front of you during a state of intense anger. This causes more anger and more negative emotions in you. Anger also seriously affects mental performance when it gets out of control. Disruptions in concentration, forgetfulness, loss of motivation, 

The goal of anger management is not to eliminate anger, but to control it. 

The aim of anger management is not to completely eliminate the feeling of anger, but to manage the severity of this intense emotion or to teach it to control the behaviors in anger. The solution is not to avoid the factors, events or people that make you angry, but to control your reactions to such factors in accordance with the situation. Your communication style is important for dealing with anger. You should follow a constructive path in your reactions to events. You should clearly define your needs and desires, and then decide what you will do to realize them without hurting the people around you and without wearing yourself out. If your anger is out of control and you cannot alleviate it, most importantly, it has started to impair your quality of life, if you have started to resort to violence, you should definitely seek expert support without wasting time. 

Expert Psychologist Ezgi Dokuzlu made 10 suggestions for managing anger:

  1. Try to calm down with breathing exercises and relaxation exercises
  2. Recall an event, person, place that comforts you
  3. Define what you want, try to convey it correctly
  4. If the violence of your anger negatively affects your communication, if necessary, stay away from your environment and try to talk again when you calm down.
  5. If you notice that your stress level is rising, take short breaks and make time for things that relax you, even if it is short.
  6. Focus on the solution, not the cause of the anger
  7. Use ‘me’ language, not ‘you’ language in your daily life
  8. Make frequent self-criticism, evaluate the comments of your close circle about your anger
  9. Get to know your feelings and thoughts better and evaluate your reactions to events and their severity by taking notes.
  10. Try to empathize more, try to be a better observer.
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